SOS Message Board: AMC: Beware Ryape! - SOS Message Board

Let's throw shoes at Ryan!!!

In honor of the Iraqi journalist who threw a pair of shoes at the idiot president of our country this past weekend, let's all take some shots at Ryan with our own shoes but this time actually HIT him with them!

*cajayson throws his shoes at Frankenstare's head and hits him! TOUCHDOWN!!!*

Concern Ryan

Blah blah blah, Super duper Ryan, with all of this phony concern you have with Annie when she is now insisting that her sugar daddy (not to be confused with her wishing to lick your "sugar daddy") is living down the hall at the funny farm. If you really were concerned at all for her mental state, Ryape, you would have seen to it during your amnesia woe is me saga that you would not be playing around with Annie's head over wanting to spend time with her and Emma and then running off across country to be with Kendall when she has a child and a husband with someone that is NOT you! Seriously, who do you think you are to now come on up with this little caring attitude of yours on Annie's emotional dilemmas? If you had any ounce of sympathy for her, it would have been displayed by you when she wanted you to be a family man and instead you treated her like the gum on the bottom of your shoe and loved the fact that your two former lovers were running around town worshipping at your shrine and altar when you could have easily told them to stop acting as if you are God's gift to women (although usually a big title like that is often used to compensate for other shortcomings IF you know what I mean!). So yea I do not believe for a fact that Ryan the bug eyed idiot is actually showing any compassion for what Annie is going through at all, especially when he was not even compassionate enough with Annie during the tornado to go find his daughter, who was alone out there (before the pseudo kidnapping), and all he cared about was getting a nice little blow that was even better than one from Heidi Fleiss.

Ryan LOD (12/17/08)

(to Dr. Sinclair about Annie): "She thinks her father is in a padded cell right next to her!"

Ryan, a padded cell is in PRISON! In a mental hospital, it is called a padded room you bug eyed idiot!

Disrespect Ryan

What Annie wants (hooo) baby the AMC fans got it
What Annie needs (hooo) you know the AMC fans got it
(Hooo) all she is asking (hooo) is for a little disrespect to Ryan
( Just a little bit) when his bug eyes come home
(Just a little bit) yeah yeah baby ( Just little bit)
When Ryape comes home ( Just a Little Bit) Mister

This con man Frankenstare is going to do you wrong while you're gone
This con man Frankenstare is going to do you wrong 'cause a commitment he don wanna
All Annie’s asking is for a little disrespect to Ryan when he comes home
(Just a Little Bit) Baby ( Just a little bit )
When Ryan comes home ( Just a little Bit) Yeah

Even in a marriage, he would not give Annie all his Cambias inherited money
And all Annie is asking in return to the bug eyed ape
Is to give her her propers when Ryape gets home

(Justa Justa Justa) Yeah baby when the moron gets home

( Just a little Bit ) Yeah ( Just a little bit )

Hooo his kisses uglier than a gummy and guess what so is that con man money
All Annie wants is for ABC fans to give him some disrespect when he gets home
( Dis Re re re re spect) Yeah baby whip it to that bug eyed gargantuan
( Just a little bit) when Ryan gets home now ( Just a little bit)

D-I-S-R-E-S-P-E-C-T Ryan should find out what it means to him
D-I-S-R-E-S-P-E-C-T, Take care of him, R-I-F-L-E ohhhh (Also sock it to him,etc.)

A little disrespect oh yeah ( Just a little bit)
A little disrespect ( Just a little Bit)

Kiss Ryan Bang Bang

Oh gosh! There should be a big increase in profits now from anyone who sells barf bags since all the tossed cookies that are present should be enough to fill up about a thousand landfills. Sheesh what gross and icky crap that all was and to do it to the worst AMC couple of all time is just sickening. And why during the holidays, I ask?! The holiday season was going wonderfully but then Kendall woke up to be a spirit for a day and now Rylee are hitting the sheets to do the nasty and have some worse leftovers than what you find when a dog throws up chili after eating a wienie! This is not good at all and now it looks as if Christmas has definitely not come to Pine Valley with the Green Butterfly and the bug eyed ape doing what should never be done and that is stroking some very ugly salami. I am not so sure that anyone is going to be able to open up presents and get their gifts, ranging from a scooter to socks to a whack whack enlarger to one a day women's for Jake to Midol for David. Talk about playing practical jokes on people and then having it knocked off the moment that you feel like not opening up presents since the feeling is definitely not merry over that foul and bug eyed tongue waggling between Dynamite Kiddo and his beloved Green Butterfly. I think I am about to go check myself into confession at church and come out once AMC makes the right decision and breaks up this eery couple. Forgive me father for I have seen the ultimate of nastys in this world...can I be awashed of my sins by shouting Ten Hail Marys? Certainly better than Ten Hail Fronsies!

Sex and the Ryan

Boy Ryan sure wants to get his ape like bug eyes worth out of those sex scenes with Greenlee since it looks like they are about to hit the sheets once again with the madness that is a Rylee sex scene. What one can expect in this hideous display of ape like nature is fake kissing, bug eyes that are stretching to the point of hitting the nipples that many of the men fixate on in the Valley, some leftovers that look about as disgusting as the fat lady at the opera tossing her own little cookies, and a protection net in front of the Green Butterfly's privates so as to prevent her from having a spawn of bug eyed apes since she does not wish to be a mother and would also not want a baby of Ryan's since she would more than likely have to raise the little taco on her own since he is of no help and neither are his helping hands. Boy they certainly are trying to sell this couple out as the Second Coming of Dynamite Kiddo but I certainly cannot buy it at all. Ryan is the one who nearly punched Greenlee after finding out she went behind his back to get some of those swimmers to impregnate herself with a poor helpless soul that could have been subjected to those ugly beedy eyes of his and Greenlee's knack for leaving a child all alone to go jump the sack with any sailor in the Valley. Then, he was also the idiot who morphed the once feisty and full of life Ms. Smythe into a Stepford Wife that puts the true Stepford Wife of Laura Bush to shame and what you get is a crap infested couple on AMC that defies the odds of a true soap opera romance and turns into disgusting, immature, sleazy, and con artist like behavior. Yep those are some odds to defy in order to turn out to be a couple like Tom Cruise and Brooke Shields! Imagine those two together-hey hey they may be worse than Rylee, which is saying a lot, don't ya know? They have the perfect opportunity to put Greens with Jake, one she shares chemistry with at all times, or Aidan but instead it is all about the moron that made her a shell of her former self. WHY WHY WHY?!

Back At Ryan

*This is a parody of Brian McKnight's "Back at One" but with the above title. Enjoy!*

It's undeniable
That Ryan and King Kong should be together
It's unbelievable
How he used to not bug eye and say that he was smart
The basis for his mega stupidity is need to know
You don't want to know just how Ryan feels
Then let us show Ryan now that when we threaten to kill him, it is for real
If all things in the fight club time
Time will definitely and most accurately reveal
Yeah...

Chorus:
One - you're like a nightmare come true
Two - just wanna kill you
Three - King Kong it's just very plain in cryin
That you're always going to be the only one for Ryan
Four - definitely repeat steps one through three
Five - make Ryan not fall in love with me
If ever we believe Ryan is making everyone cryin
Then we will not start back at Ryan

So Dynamite Kiddo Incredible
The way his bug eyes work themselves from his Frankenstare skull and out
And all very very emotional
Once you know what Ryan the idiot con is all about, babe
And undesirable
For Ryan and any sane Pine Valley woman to not be apart
Sex with this ape never would of made it very far
Cause Ryan knows King Kong got the keys to hhis heart

(Chorus)
One - you're like a nightmare come true
Two - just wanna kill you
Three - King Kong it's just very plain in cryin
That you're always going to be the only one for Ryan
Four - definitely repeat steps one through three
Five - make Ryan not fall in love with me
If ever we believe Ryan is making everyone cryin
Then we will not start back at Ryan

Say farewell to the dark knight
We thankfully see the coming of the sun
Ryan always feels like a little child
Whose life will start fortunately and just be done
King Kong came and breathed a dead life
Into Ryan's lonely ferret face heart of dine
The magnificent Kong threw out that life line
Just thankfully in the nick of time...

(Chorus)
One - you're like a nightmare come true
Two - just wanna kill you
Three - King Kong it's just very plain in cryin
That you're always going to be the only one for Ryan
Four - definitely repeat steps one through three
Five - make Ryan not fall in love with me
If ever we believe Ryan is making everyone cryin
Then we will not start back at Ryan

Ryan and new mommy

Ugh there are no words to describe how I am feeling right now after hearing that moronic ape tell Emma that Greenlee can be her new mommy. No friggen words. Maybe I will rant more on this tomorrow but, for now, I am tired and do not feel like typing a whole lot.

UGH!

Ryan the Protector

How nice he is to be the good ole Dynamite Kiddo protector of all things Greenlee against the really bad Annie. Yep, at one point, Ryan considered her Queen Anibelle but now it looks as if he is going to put her there on the list of The Wicked Witch of the West with thinking Annie is going to be sporting a green nose, pointy hat, telling Greenlee, "I will get you, my pretty, and your little dog, too!" with a cackle and some smoke to come later as she makes her grand disappearance only to kidnap Greenlee to her castle a couple days later. No water can make her die, however! Annie is one of a kind and cannot be defeated so it is going to take a foul, loathsome, disgusting person like the ape to play HIGH H0 HERO and protect his precious Green Butterfly. Since we are on the subject of Dorothy Gale and friends, Ryape does remind one of the Wizard of Oz with his threats of taking them down, yada yada yada, but really he is just the man behind the curtain talking, not having any real sense of doing any harm to the beloved citizens of Pine Valley. He must have this charm in him now to think he can take out the whacko Annie that he was the reason behind making crazy as it is. Yep, I need not remind you of all the times Ryan deemed he would be there for Annie and Emma only to go chasing after either Greens or Kendall. Heck, if he really wants to make good use of his time going after Kendall, get her a Burger King first and then go see her to give her a delicious Whopper. Talk about wanting the "fries" IF you know what I mean! So now I just see this little thing of Ryan protecting the Green Butterfly as, once again, the show pimping and propping him to ensure that he comes out the hero in all things Pine Valley while everyone else just sit back and let Ryan be SuperApe. Superman may have had the ability to fly but Ryan's superhero abilities are to bug those eyes out to the point that it scares someone and they are able to shrink back into being a little baby so that the gargantuan King Ryan Kong wins the battle. That must be his little trick to take care of Annie. Let the APE like games begin! BARF!!!

Right Here With Ryan

*This is a parody of Brandy's "Right Here" but with the above title. Enjoy!*

oh when you feel that heart of yours is hurt from a fight club
And you see a humanlike ape that looks very dumb
and when he displays all his failures in one lump sum

you'll be right here with Ryan

You'll be right here with Ryan
oh, oh x16
You'll be right here with Ryan

When your Dynamite Kiddo life sees too many bug eyes,
and hears many con man lies
The ape known as Ryan cannot slow it down, oh
just when you think he may finally go off and die
'Scared you might have to hear another lie
Zach will be your ground, oh

oh when you feel that heart of yours is hurt from a fight club
and you see a humanlike ape that looks very dumb
and when he displays all his failures in one lump sum
you'll be right here with Ryan
and when your tears after seeing his scary self do not ever go on to drying
and the world is scared at seeing something so hideous trying
and when he displays all his failures in one lump sum
you'll be right here with Ryan

oh oh x10
(x2)
You will be right here with Ryan
you'll be right here with Ryan

and when you are trapped in a bomb shelter and there's just no key
and you see the Frankenstare and cannot breathe
Zach breathes for you
the fire at the bar has got you on both knees
and those walls are always closing in but Ryan will
make sure he can still annoy you and break it through
and when you are feelingalone
Ryan is that way as well with no friends and he be at home
whenever a Greenlee or a Dixie comes and go
you know Ryan’s bug eyes got you

oh when you feel that heart of yours is hurt from a fight club
And you see a humanlike ape that looks very dumb
and when he displays all his failures in one lump sum

you'll be right here with Ryan
(you'll see his bug eyes in the sun)
and when your tears after seeing his scary self do not ever go on to drying
and the world is scared at seeing something so hideous trying
and when he displays all his failures in one lump sum
you'll be right here with Ryan



Ryan will unfortunately be here right beside you
every step into a manh*ole we can hope he takes, yea
If so, Zach will be all of your strength and your shelter
He will shield you from the rain

(x2)
oh when you feel that heart of yours is hurt from a fight club
and you see a humanlike ape that looks very dumb
and when he displays all his failures in one lump sum
you'll be right here with Ryan
and when your tears after seeing his scary self do not ever go on to drying
and the world is scared at seeing something so hideous trying
and when he displays all his failures in one lump sum
you'll be right here with Ryan

(x4)
Ryan will be right here with you
you'll be right here with Ryan

yea

God and Ryan

Oh great so now we got the holiest of all holys in Pine Valley actually saying to his beloved Greenlee that the Gods have blessed them with him somehow seeing that the magical date for their little union shall be on Valentine's Day. Seriously, does the ape ever stop and listen to reason? There is no way the Gods of anywhere would bless a pontificating, hypocritical, narcissistic, selfish, self centered, peabrain like himself since he does everything possible to make the human race look horrific, insulting the species nearly 24/7, and comes off really upsetting the higher ups. If the Gods had it their way, they would have killed off this bug eyed idiot a while back but I guess, in the world of Frons and company, a Dynamite Kiddo obsessed comic book fan has more importance than the people who create the entire world. I bet now Ryan claims he talks to God and he tells everyone how much of friends they are. Yea, like Ryan truly can make a friend these days. Who would befriend someone participating in fight clubs, lying about wanting to be with his family when he says he will but then jets across the country to try and get his eyes on the prize in Kendall Hart when she is married? Is there anyone who would befriend this guy? Nope, not even the Gods and they are very smart when it comes to who on Earth is a moron and who happens to be a genius or just plain great. Christ may have liked all of the children but certainly not the Gods. I cannot stop laughing at this thought of Ryan believing that the Gods bless him. Why bless someone who verbally and sometimes physically abuses people for crying out loud? There is nothing to bless there unless you want to bless the fact that you can create people who will not get any lower than this since Ryan is as low and disgusting as they come! Now THERE is something to truly bless but it is not the idea that Ryan would come up with when thinking Gods bless him. What a God darn idiot! (No pun intended)

Ryan and Greenlee Cottontail

Wow they really are making him out to be like some rabbit who will hump a dump a chump and maybe even a lump like a Green bumpity bump bump! Seriously, he is putting the humping rabbits to shame out there with all that little action and stroking some pepperoni with Greenlee that it is getting rather nauseating. These two really need to go find a MoHOtel Six and just stay there for a long time so that way they have their own little place to hump like rabbits and make it out as if they have nothing to worry about in their little Dynamite Kiddo World. It really is sickening to watch them act as if all that should matter in this lifetime is some hot and sexy love but it really is just as foul as watching a deer get run over by a semi truck after staring at it in the road within those headlights and making sure to pull off the bug eyed look that makes the driver get really scared.

Ten Years of Ryan

For the past ten years (technically 11 but his holiness took a year off), AMC and Pine Valley has been "blessed" by the appearance of Ryan Lavery. During that time, he has conned, siphoned off someone else's money to fund a rescue operation, rode in on his white horse to rescue a damsel in distress and in turn to be propped one too many times, tied up a woman to prevent her from seeing her lover, bug eyed, participated in a fight club, married a princess and fell in love with someone other than himself, dodged death at too many turns, made a woman go psycho, told his wife he would love her and be with her and their daughter without knowing them via amnesia and then jetted off across the country to be with someone he "loved", pontificated, been hypocritical, conned someone into getting into their will, blackmailed, acted like he was smart when he was dumb, rode off in the rain on his motorcycle over a misconception, pitted two friends against each other, gotten married at a castle over a busienss arrangement and not for love, obsessed over Dynamite Kiddo comics, upset his sister and then had her pimp and prop him, donated swimmers so that many could have his baby, had the mannerisms of an ape and hence gotten the nickname of Ryape, babysat his own children (who babysits their own children?), trashed a woman relentlessly and had that woman's mother (one who never refers to herself as "Grandma") pimp and prop him like no other, gotten together with someone to make others jealous when nobody would be jealous of a moron like him, hosted a party where he told people to get naked, gone on a reality show about dancing only to lose, overacted, flailed his arms one too many times, unfortunately not run into a Semi or Janet From Another Planet's crowbar, and much more.

If you ask me, this is not a good milestone for the show and they need to cut their losses and ditch Ryape Lavery NOW!

Ballerina Ryan

Oh how nice of Ryan to thank Anna Corrinnina for bringing Emma home from ballet practice. Yea, as if he cannot do that on his own. Last I checked, Ryape has a car and can go there and pick her up himself. Why on Earth have the nanny do everything and you do next to nothing? I am just shocked that Ryan did not actually be there at the ballet practice himself since he can probably pull off being a good ole ballerina himself. Heck, he can even show some new moves for the ballerinas to practice, such as The Dynamite Kiddo, The Bug Eyed Tap Dance, The Frankenstare Twist, The Fight Club Shout, and so much more. Hey, that is a good idea for the ape! Have him try out to be a ballerina! After all, he has done everything known to man: superhero, bartender, con artist, CEO of Internet venture, head of three major corporations, fight club participant, dancer on reality TV, knight in shining armor, boat owner, advertising salesman. Hey, just add the list of ballerina on his resume and he is sure to fit in at your next NutCRACKer, Swan Lake, and anything you can think of in the name of successful ballets. Oh wait! If the ape is in the ballet, it is destined not to be a success. After all, he was on Dancing With The Stars and did not really bring in ratings for that show and also did not get even into the Top Four of the competition so perhaps being a ballerina is not in the cards for Ryape. Still, it would be something to see him try on a tutu and make history by being the first man ape to wear a tutu/attempt the ballerina dance recitals. Hey, if there is one thing AMC is known for, it is paying attention to real life history and incoporating it into their stories. Woot woot to a Ryape Ballerina story!

Let's Get Ryan's Death On

*This is a parody of Marvin Gaye's "Let's Get It On" but with the above title*

Everyone been really trying, Annie
Trying to not hold back this trigger to his Frankenstare head for so long
And if you feel like the AMC fans feel, Annie
Then come on, oh, please please come on
Whoo, let's get Ryan’s death on
Ah, babe, let's get Ryan’s death on
Let's kill that man ape, baby
Let's get Ryan’s death on, sugar
Let's get Ryan’s death on
Whoo-ooh-ooh

We're all bug eyed wannabe hero hating people
With so much bullets to his brain to give
Understand us please, Annie
Since he has been on the air we got so tired of him and to be
Let's make sure he does not live
We all hate him

There's of course nothing wrong
With us killing the Ryape
Baby, no, no, no, no, no
And giving any guns to us to kill him can never be wrong
If that hate for him is so high and true
Oh, Annie, ooh, ooh

But everyone definitely does know
How sweet and wonderful life is without him and how it can be
Whoo-ooh
We are all saying it is true, Annie
To get his death on with us and me
Ooh, ooh, ooh

Nobody has to or is going to worry (about it not being done), everybody is going to push
Will have it happen so to do that we will push, Annie
So come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, Annie
No more beating around Ryan’s bush, hey

Let's get Ryan’s death on, ooh, ooh
Let's get Ryan’s death on
You know what we are all talking about
Come on, Annie, hey, hey
Let him being six feet under come out
If you believe in him finally dying and taking his fight club ways with him
Let's get Ryan’s death on, ooh, ooh
Let's get Ryan’s death on, Annie
This very next second, oh yeah
Let's get Ryan’s death on
Please, please, get Ryan’s death on
Hey, hey

We all know that you definitely know
That his bug eyed death is what we have been dreaming of
Don't you, Annie?
The idea of him being dead and buried makes us in love
Whoo hoo doopity doo

Nobody has to or is going to worry (about it not being done), everybody is going to push
Will have it happen so to do that we will push, Annie
So come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, Annie
No more beating around Ryan’s bush, hey

Gonna get Ryan’s death on
Beggin' you, Annie, let us get Ryan’s death on
You don't have to ever worry since it is not wrong
If the spirit never comes back, let us groove to his death all night long
Let your love for his death bring you back down
Oh, get Ryan’s death on, come on, baby

Do you know that we obviously mean it?
We have all been sanctified
Hey, hey
Annie, you know he gives you bad feelings, so bad

Nothing wrong with him being dead
If you want to not have to hear him speak like he is full of paint lead
Just let him into the crypt please go
Oh, Annie
Let's get Ryan’s death on

School Ryan

I am so shocked that Ryan is not taking his daughter to school since it looks as if he has the capability of doing it but is letting the nannies take Emma to go read, write, color, do anything and everything that a little child does. Doesn't he have a job? If not, why can't he take her to school himself? He seems to just pawn the child off to the nannies, Zach, Greenlee at times, Opal, and anyone he can think of all so he can get the Green Butterfly to himself and have some nice little action when it comes to the Royal Lips of Green. Is he just that pathetic, really? I guess so if he just feels as if he has no parenting responsibilities whatsoever and his only goal in life is to get some blowing action from Greenlee and, by blow, I do not mean the fan blowing on them to cool down their hot and heavy ape like scenes of bug eyes, hairy beasthood, ape like mannerisms. It really is not a good thing (sorry, Martha Stewart) and it can only get worse. Thankfully, there is not going to be much of this going on for a while but, while it is here, the show might as well calm it down on these two waxing their "surfboards" so that we do not have to make the sewage plants go on overload with all the barfing that erupts upon bed scenes between Ape Man and The Royal Lips of Green. It is a good thing they got school nowadays so that he can have all the time to himself to get a little boinking and some really heavy petting that one does to a dog. Speaking of dogs, Ryan also has the mannerisms of one himself. Wouldn't it be something if everyone barked at him to speak to him in his native tongue? Heck, give him a bone (be sure not to add an "R" on that word or else the sewage plant explodes and covers half the United States!), a chew toy, another dog to hump hump and hump, a doggie door, a doghouse. Man, now we know why they call what Rylee does "d0ggy style"...but it is the kind that is real icky and not something that is a fan favorite amongst the AMC viewers. Yep, god bless school! Ryan is very happy there is school! Too bad he never went to one in the first place or else he might prove to have a triple digit IQ rather than one in negative numbers and going down even faster than he gets down in his own bed!

The Castle In The Ryan

Oh boy so now Ryan wants to have the grand wedding with Greenlee and the great Reese/Bianca at a castle in CONecticut. Sheesh, what is Ryan's deal with marrying at castles? He married Gillian both times at the Chapel of Wildwind (which is a castle), Greenlee back in 2004 at a castle, then Annie outside of Wildwind castle and now he plans on doing it at one in CONnecticut. They had better charge him an arm and a leg to get married there due to how he will be nothing but an annoyance and there should always be a service charge for anyone who is plain annoying. If this was a policy at all businesses across America, the ape would definitely go broke! LOL usually one thinks of marrying at a castle if they are soulmates, destined to be, the supercouple that is made for soaps. Ryan/Greenlee are not that couple. They were abusive when together from 2004-2005, she turned into a Stepford Wife when that is not part of Greenlee's character, had no chemistry, sex scenes were more disgusting than a giraffe mating with an armadillo, and you can think of the rest. I wonder if Ryan gets married at a castle since his favorite comic book hero, Dynamite Kiddo, perhaps lived at one himself. Does anyone know? I guess this would definitely explain a lot as to why he has an affinity for marrying at Sleeping Beauty's castle or Cinderalla's or Snow White's and anyone else. Oh yea how about Shrek? Might as well do a movie after that one and call it Jerk starring his holiness Ryan Lavery! Heck, I bet Ryan's next wedding will be at Disneyland or Walt Disney World where they got Sleeping Beauty and Cinderella castles. Imagine him then going for a plunge on Splash Mountain. Those bug eyes would scare the waters below that they create a hurricane and take out everything in its path! LOL talk about a chaotic wedding that only a puke like Ryan would deserve!

21 Questions for Ryan

1. Why do you have the mannerisms of an ape?

2. Do you ever stop to realize how much grander life would be if you were never born?

3. Have you considered suing your brains for non support?

4. Why is it that the only location where you do not look out of place is the landfill?

5. Do you know any other languages besides Dynamite Kiddo-isms?

6. How come you never remember your love for Gillian?

7. What makes you think you are God's gift to women?

8. Did you ever con an old lady out of her walker?

9. Can you spell your own name?

10. Do they pay you a nickel for every time you pull off the bug eyed stare?

11. If the answer to #10 is yes, are you a millionaire by now just through that "nickel business"?

12. Do you realize that your big bank account is used to compensate for your shortcomings?

13. Why do you think it is okay to assault police officers?

14. Have you ever applied to be a display at a zoo?

15. Are you sleeping with someone at Cambias Industries to keep your job?

16. Why do you think that, when people put the "L" sign on their forehead to you, you think it stands for "Love" as in they love you?

17. Do you think BYOB means "Bring your own bed"?

18. Why are you still breathing?

19. Have you participated in fight clubs all your life? If so, how did you manage to survive?

20. Do you take medication to deal with the voices in your pants?

21. Why do you babysit your own children rather than raise them?

Curiosity Should Kill Ryan

Oh boy we all knew this was coming, folks! TIIC at ABC have to insert Ryan into a story that has nothing to do with him and hence it makes him look out of place. But everyone knows that about the only place where Ryan does not look out of place is the place known as a place where you stuff garbage in its place and hence is that place called the landfill in which anything that has no place in society goes for stinking up a place and its place belongs in a place known only as a landfill. So, the story should be about The Kane Women grieving over Josh's death, Zach's pursuit in getting Kendall a heart, and Kendall waking up to many news events happening around her. So what is a network and show to do? Insert Ryape into the story! Yippee they filled one part of a quota so far in sticking Ryan into a story that has nothing to do with him all so he can see if he is curious as to if Zach shot Josh on purpose since he knew it would help Kendall. Something tells me now that the ape is going to think Zach did shoot him on purpose and with intentions, thus it gives him a Dynamite Kiddo leg up in suing for custody of Spike and getting him in his care. If I had to choose, I would let Kendall raise Spike since she has shown nothing but love, love, and love for the little boy. Ryan was all about obsessing over getting with The Royal Lips of Green to not even care one bit over Spike's well being because, if he was, he would spend more time with his baby boy than run around chasing after his beloved Green Butterfly. I can only see Ryape now with this possibility: he will file for custody, huffing, puffing, beating his arms over his chest, having everyone sing his praises or else they get multiple bug eyes to have them throw up their lunch and hence increase that landfill, and then claim he is Father of the Year and needs to be his fulltime parent rather than Kendall, the mother who tends to be there for almost always 24/7...and, outside of this shooting, Zach has definitely been more of a father to Spike than the ape ever could be. But, with Ryape, he never criticizes himself since the entire town of Pine Valley has gotten him on the track to canonization and Saint hood (the good news with being called a Saint is one has to be dead to get that honor...so kill off Ryan and just name him Saint even though he is not one!) and everyone says how wonderful he is, his great parenting skills, blah blah blah all as he battles to, LIKE WITH ANNIE, take a child away from its mother when the mother loves the child more than anything in the world while his biggest love is for himself and his Green Butterfly. Sickening if it goes this way!

Risky Ryape Business

I could not believe my ears (okay, I can since Ryape always says stupid crap) when I heard the moron actually say that Zach made it his business to know that Annie killed baby brother Richie. Uh huh and this is coming from someone who just got involved in the business of something between Zach, The Kane women, and Reese by questioning someone's motives over a death that did not involve him or be of someone he had major ties with at all. The only time I can remember Ryan and Josh sharing scenes was when they both drugged Zach a couple of years ago to get info on The Satin Slayer. Other than that, they were not hanging out at the bar, talking about woe is me stories of Ryan having an abusive father and Josh being nothing more than a miracle fetus that needed to be saved and then discovering his "father" was buried alive. Nope, Ryan and Josh were not that close but Ryan made it his business to wonder if Zach intentionally shot someone since he knew the heart would be a match for Kendall. Like Zach had it tested beforehand! DUH nope he is not that paranoid, Ryape! Zach is not like you, Ryape, one who kidnaps someone on a plane to see if he has leukemia when this guy did nothing to you and the issue was with his sister that he has a right to have issue with when she sent him up the river for something he did not do. Yep, you made that your business! Back when Zach first came to town, you told him to leave Maria alone and St. Maria of the Push Up Bra told you to back off and mind your own business. So how funny of the ape to condemn someone for making everything his business when he is just as guilty of the above. Can thy say HyPOCRITE?! Kill this moron off already and stop making the viewers puke over his hypocrisy, his holier than thou crap, his superiority complex, his God complex, and you get my point. I am shocked Ryan has not had an Oedipus Complex since he is known for being insane in that membrane while driving in the fast lane, never being sane, should be whipped by a cane, never give him a candy cane....business is something Ryan knows nothing about, whether it be a money making business or personal after comments like his on today's show!